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Dec 21, 2012

Limerinski (Maud)

We sometimes do poetry, right? So here goes:

Monica Lewinski, former White House intern

The Washington Post runs a weekly contest in its Style section.

Ted Kaczynski, former assistant professor, dept. of mathematics, Berkeley University (possibly the best math department in the world), serving a life sentence for UNA-bombing

This week contestants had to use the two names Lewinsky and Kaczynski in the same limerick. Here are the three winning entries:
 
Third Place:
 
There once was a girl named Lewinsky
Who played on a flute like Stravinsky
Twas 'Hail to the Chief'
On this flute made of beef
That stole the front page from Kaczynski.
 
Second place:
 
Said Clinton to young Ms. Lewinsky,
We don't want to leave clues like Kaczynski,
Since you made such a mess,
Use the hem of your dress
And please wipe that stuff off your chinsky.
 
And the winning entry:
 
Lewinsky and Clinton have shown
What Kaczynski must surely have known,
That an intern is better
Than a bomb in a letter,
When deciding how best to be blown.

(Please let us know in the comment section what you think of the ranking, and, oh, Stravinsky didn't play the flute)

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm not so sure about the ranking. I actually like the physical allusions to the male member (3rd place) and semen (2nd) place. There's something juicy to both poems that the winning poem appears to lag.

Anonymous said...

I can't agree more --- Babette B.

Anonymous said...

She offered her honor,
He honored her offer,
And all night,
He went on her,
And off her.

--- William Shakespeare