Nov 18, 2013

Green Eyes --- Part II (This is heaven) (Chapter II, outline)

Yes, folks, the Green Eyes end with the words "I'm ticklish," spoken by Albert, the beach bear from the opening of the first part.  He had used the same words in Chapter Three ("Sex on the beach") to drag John into a brief, hand-driven session between the sheets (or towels). He's repeating himself for a reason now, and Alex, in the opening lines of Part II, will somehow suggest to a taken-aback John that Albert has a point and should be accommodated. Another unprintable chapter will be written and relegated to an appendix and replaced by a flat summary of the events related there, events which are as predictable in their totality as they are unpredictable in their microstructure, thus faithfully replicating the structure of the universe --- we simply can't settle for less when it comes to graphic sex.

Gay Beach, Rehoboth Beach, DE...

...which serves as model for the gay beach of Georgia Beach

The true opening chapter of Part II, ie. Chapter Two, will see John and Alex walking away from the scene of the crime (any sex ("carnal knowledge") outside marriage is technically still felonious in Georgia), with John trying to take mental stock. His first thought, obviously, will be that the happy ending is over. Alex will disagree, if only on formal grounds ("ends can't end"), but the semantic tussle remains unresolved since the cell phone rings, John's cell phone. And it is, yes, you guessed right, it must be Ben, since the only way to create a new arc of tension in Part II without having John and Alex separating has to involve some sort of triangle, or "ménage," as Americans would say. So Ben calls in all innocence to announce that Luke, the convenience-store vampire, has hired him (Ben) as salesperson for Luke's market stand at the venue of the Festival Week which is about to commence today. And although it isn't made explicit, Ben's assumption will be that he (Ben) can stay at John's place during the week. Ben does not know about Alex. Alex knew about Ben ("You've been all over the place, haven't you") but that was before amnesia struck. John, first, misses the chance to come clean about Alex toward Ben, and then misses the chance to come clean about Ben toward Alex. The soap must go on. John will have several more opportunities to come clean and miss them all, while we, the reader, will develop an inkling as to the growing understanding between Alex and Ben behind John's guilty back (the understanding).

This will be a tricky dialogue to write, wish us luck.

Update (2): And here it is, the tricky dialogue, or at least a fragment of it.

Update (1): We are already writing the tricky dialogue, and want Ben let say "fest week" when referring to the upcoming festival week. But we are not so sure. "Street fest," okay, but "fest week?" So we ask Glenn per email.

Possibly not, Glenn writes back. People will understand it, but it doesn't sound American. And then he sends this picture...

Renate, Glenn's wife
...and writes: "Are you aware that your question this morning interrupted our luxury breakfast in an Airstream trailer here in Austin, TX..." (they are in Austin for some reason, I think Formula I or something).

Are you still there? Then you'll possibly like the GREEN EYES. The first part is out now, available as Kindle book on Amazon, under this link:

Night Owl Reviews