Google problem

It's a neologism, we think, not ours unfortunately, and we are late, late, the meme is at least 12 hours old, not including the provincial delays we are running up here in the Mediterranean woods, but there it is:

Santorum has a Google problem.

Link, link, click. Who doesn't have a Google problem, one wonders.

But here we have a little story that tells you why our problem is different from Santorum's:

Earlier, at a town hall meeting in the basement of the public library in Keene, Santorum was gently confronted about health insurance by an emergency room nurse who had just worked an overnight shift and apologized for being tired.
She said her son, who recently graduated from college, had been diagnosed with cancer at age 5. Why, she wanted to know, should her son pay more for health insurance as an adult when he had done nothing wrong and had not caused his own health woes.
“You believe that someone with a healthcare issue should pay the same amount as a healthy person?” he asked.
The nurse replied that she did.
“That’s not how it works,” said Santorum, comparing health insurance to auto insurance. “People with higher risk should pay more. Why should we charge more to people who have done everything right?”

"That's not how it works." You see him standing there, piercing his pious lips? "That's not how it works." Uttering a phrase that's completely besides the point: "That's not how it works," a phase that contextually confounds normative and factual standards, and, in its confusion,  is wrong on the factual side, since that's how health insurance does work in most western societies. And the fact that it works this way is often attributed to our Christian heritage, to the Gospel, to the words of Jesus, "help the weak, help the poor."

This, what was the definition, this

frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex

Being the nerds we are, we would like to draw your attention to the fact that the original definition, now 4 days old, in the Urban Dictionary, is slightly more complex, ie.

"Santorum: The sometimes frothy, usually slimy, amalgam of lubricant, stray fecal matter, and ejaculate that leaks out of the receiving partner's anus after a session of anal intercourse."

It's a fairly stiff insult by our standards, worse than any Sicilian swearing we've ever heard of. And he deserves it, folks, he deserves it, as President Obama would say (no, he wouldn't).

Let's relax now. We've been to Keene, NH, several times, since there's an airfield there where you land when your commuter plane gets indisposed in mid-air. There's no tower, but a sign next to the tarmac, that read (in my days, 1985): "Pilots, when windy, use northern runway." Next to the airfield, there is an extremely popular fish restaurant where you would eat red lobsters, glad to have survived yet another emergency landing. There's also a college, Antioch College. Antioch was the capital of Syria in Roman times, famous for its homosexual demographics.

Let's hope this post shows up on the first page of the Google search results, but it possibly won't.

Update: Santorum as Socrates (he has a point here, we think):



Update update: Kennedy was known as the man who killed the hat. And now, Santorum, Romney, Gingrich, etc. they are all in this together, not wearing a tie while discussing polygamy. You're running for the presidency, for God's sake. Aren't you obliged to wear a tie? The men who killed the tie, that'll how history will judge you.

PS: Spell checker does not know Santorum (as opposed to Obama, Romney, etc).

Update, update, update: You don't want to miss Maureen Dowd on this.